"A G"

KAMAAL KA SAWAAL.?

Biwiya Apne Pati ko "A G" kyun bolti h ?

Kyunki bhare Bazaar me

"ABE GULAAM "(A.G.)
kehna achaa nhi lagta

Mother-In-Law

Why did Mrs.Vora throw Out her Mother-In-Law?

...??

....???
Because ..



Baba Ramdev said


"Apni saans ko bahar nikalo !!"

One More Word

Wife : "One More Word
from You and
I am Going back
to My Mother's Place..." .
.
.
.
.
Husband : "TAXI"

Service

2 chhote ladke baat kar rahe the.
1st: Meri maa service karti hai..,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
..
..
..
2nd: meri maa to tennis hi nahi khelti.
Ha ha ha :-D

CHILD

Sir was travlleing in train,

A woman sat on his son's berth & didn't get up...

Sir shouted:

"THIS LADY IS NOT GIVING BIRTH TO MY CHILD"

RAVAN

Aisi kon si baat he,
jo RAVAN akele kr sakta he,par RAM nahi??

Socho.

Socho.

Sochosocho.

Thoda dimag lagao.

GROUP DISCUSSION

"COMING SOON"

Ek aadmi Ki Ladaai Apne Baap Se Ho Gayi To Usne Apne

Baap Ki Photo Kabristaan Me

Ek Ped Pe Latka Di.

Aur Neeche Likh Dia-

"COMING SOON"

suicide

Latest Joke....
A Student goes into a library & ask 4 a book on suicide..!

Librarian : Get lost dude, U won't bring it back...!

Petrol

Petrol ke Rate badhane pas sir bola: "Menu koi Farak nahi penda.
Phele bhi 100 ka Bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka Bharwata hun."

Dhoni's Child Be Named ... ???

If Dhoni Weds Sania ...

What Would Their First
Child Be Named ... ???












Think













Think






Aray Yaar It Would Be

DHANIA ... ;->

1000 Kg = 1 Ton

Maths Teacher Was
Teaching Mathematical
Conversion ...

Teacher - If
1000 Kg = 1 Ton

For 3000 Kg = How Much?

Johny -
Ton ! Ton ! Ton ... ;->

Hawalaat

Santa: Oye Banta
Ye Bata "Jail" Ko Urdu
Main "Hawalaat" Kyun
Kehte Hyn ???

Banta: Kyun K "Jail"
Main Khaane Ko Sirf
"Hawa" Aur "Laat" Hi
Milti Hy ... ;->

Money

A daughter announced her engagement

Her father asked:Does dis guy have any money?
Dtr:Oh Daddy!

U men r all alike,

thats exactly what he asked abt U

Animal rights

Have u heard about the man who threw his wife into a pond of crocodiles? He's now being harassed by the animal rights for being cruel to the crocodiles.

brain

Dont keep me in ur hrt but keep me in ur brain


.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.

bcoz

.
.
..
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
.
.
.



Rehne ki jagah jitni khali ho, rehne me utna maza ata he

Cyclone

Bank Manger To Pathan
In A Interview ...

"What Is Cyclone?"



Pathan:
"It Is The Loan Given
By Bank To Purchase
A Cycle ..." ;->

Complete & Finished?

Wats the diff between Complete & Finished?

If you find good wife u r complete otherwise u r finished.

Company

The best way to
releave stress is

To put your head on
the table, snooze,
yawn and say loud ...



























"Bhaar Main Jaye
Company ..." ;->

Girlfrend

Beggar: Saab 12Rs do na coffee peeni hai.

Man: Lekin coffee to 6Rs ki hai?

Beggar: Par saab girlfrend bhi to hai.

Man: Bhikari hokar bhi GF banali.

Beggar: Na saab,GF ne Bhikari bana diya!

LAW

Law Professor: Which is the most important LAW of Finance for Starting a New Business?

Student: Father-in-Law!

SENT MESSAGE

Oye yeh SENT MESSAGE kya hota hai..?

Dosra :

Jis MESSAGE mein khushboo ho usse SENT msg kehte hain . . . .

lecturer

Police arrested a drunkard & asked: Where r u goin?

Man: I'm goin 2 listen lecture on ill effcts of drinking.

Cop: Who'll lecture at midnite?

Man: My wife...

Wife

1st mene apni wife ko matric karwaaya
phir inter karwaya
phir B.Com karwaya
phir PHD karwaya
2nd : Ab koi acha larka dekh kar shadi karwaa de.

Law

One Firm Was Recruiting Lawyers .
sir Was Taking Interviews

Sir: Do U Know All d Laws ?

Lawyer: Yeah !

Sir : Tell Me The
3rd Law Of Thermodynamics ...

Bill Gates

A question from sir to Bill Gates:

"Oye...Tera Naam "Gate"s Kaise Pada.

Tu To "WINDOWS" Bechta Hain na!!

Plane

1 Man 1st time Plane mein betha
Plane runway pe chal rha tha.
Man ne pilot ko zordar thappar mara or bola:
Mjhy dair ho rahi hai or tu BY ROAD ja raha hai......

Adalat

Qatil: Koshish Krna Umr-Qaid Ho
Phansi Na Ho !

Wakeel: Tm Fikr Na Kro

After Adalat Qatil: Kia Hua ?

Wakeel: Bht Mshkil Se Umr-Qaid Hui,
Adalat Tou Bari Ker Rahi Thi ... ;->

Fried Fish

Man Goes To Hotel And Orders Fried Fish.

Waiter: Sir! French Or Spanish?

Man: Oh! Koi Si Bhi Le Aa Maine Kaunsi Baate Karne Hain..!!

Marriage

Before marriage: Roses are red, sky is blue. U r beautiful, I luv u.

After marriage: Roses are dead, I'm blue. U r my headache, one day I'll kill u.

Cream FAIR & LOVELY

1 Class me 2 Ladkiya,1 gori 1 kali.

Kali:Tu konsi cream lagati hai?

Gori:FAIR&LOVELY or tu?

Piche baitha hua bola





Cherry Blossam

DocToR:
sir Jee Aap K
GuRDaY FaiL
HoGaYe HaiN


sir:
Ha Ha Ha


WaT A Joke
"Mere GuRdaY To
Kabhi SchOOL
GaYe Hi Nahi

WoH FaiL KeSe
HoSKte Hain

Mobile

Ek din santa bazaar gaya.

Raste me ek chor uska mob. lekar bhag gaya..

Santa peeche bhaga,

phir zor se chillaya..

"LEJA LEJA,

ISKA CHARGER TO MERE PAS HAI!!!!

Love Marige

Son-Aapki Love Marige Hui Thi Na
Papa-Ha Par Kaise Pata?
Son-Apki Shadi or Mere Janam Me Sirf 6 Months Ka Farq He

Disco Dance

Disco Dance Karte Huye Larke Aur Larki Ko
2 Kute Dekh Rahe The.

Ye Kya Kr Ha " 1 Kute Ne Dosre Se Pocha

Dosra kuta Bola Ye Tou Mai Nahe Janta Ho
Mai Ye Janta Ho k Jub Mai Is Tarah Karta Ho
Tou Mera Malik Mujhe

peit k kide Marne k Dawai Pilata Hai......

Potty

Ek bangali Mareez:
"Dr Sahab
Potla Potla Potty Aata
Hy
Khaany Ko Mann Nahi
Kerta Hy"

Dr:
"Ye Lo Dawai
Motta Motta Potty
Aaye Ga
Jese Marzi Kaat k
Khana ..."

Problem

If U Hve Any Problem !

Mujhy Batao
I'll Help U (:


If U Don't Hve Any
Problem !

Tab Bhi
Mujhy Batao





I'll Create Problem










Aakhir Dost Hoty Kis
Liye Hyn ... ;->

Kaarkhany

A Man Going 2 His Work,
Another Ma Asks:
"Kahan Ja Raha Hy
Bhai?"
2nd Replied: Yar Kaarkhany
Ja Raha Hoon
1st: Aby Ghar Me Khana Nhi
Pkta Jo Car Khane Ja Raha HY ;->

Party

GirL In A Party To A Man:Excues Me Sir
Kia Ap Mere FACE Se 1 Cheez Hata Sakte Hein?

Man Khush Hote Hue
Han Han Bolo Kia?
.
.
.
.
.
GirL:Kuttay Apni Nazr Hata.

Andha

Ek Larka Dr Sy Lagta Hai Ma Andha Ho Gya Hon

Dr. Ny Uski Ankhon Ko Check Kia
Or Kha Nahi Beta Tmhari Ankhein Tu Theek Hain.

Larka. Tu Phr Newspaper Me
Mujhy Maira Roll Num Kyun Nazar Nahi Aa Rha ?

Blood test

2 chldrn were sitting
outside a clinic
1 of them was crying v.loudly.
2nd Child: Y r U crying?
1st Child: I came here 4 a blood test
2nd: So? Are you afraid?
1st: No. 4 d blood test, they cut my finger.
At this, 2nd started crying
The 1st one was astonished n
askd: Y r U crying nw?
2nd: I came 4 a urine test ...

Bidi

Ek baar ek aadmi bina Jali bidi pi rha tha

2: Yaar bidi se koi dhua nahi aa raha hai??

1: Kar di na phir wohi baat, Ye "CNG" bidi hai!!

Daant

Child 2 Dentist Doctor..!!!

Kya Dard k Baigar Bhi Daant nikalay Ja Saktay Hain ??

Dr: Nahi

Child: Ager Main Nikal K Dikhao

Dr: nikaloo

Child: He He He He He He !

Beggar

Beggar: I'm the author of a book called "150 methods 2 become Rich."
Man: Then why are you begging?
Beggar: This is one of the best methods..!

Chandra

Slow turtle

A turtle was walking down an alley in New York when he was mugged by a gang of snails. A police detective came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened. The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied "I don't know, it all happened so fast."

Docter

French doctor: Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take
a kidney out of one man, put it in another and have him looking for work in
six weeks.

German doctor:That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it
in, and have him looking for work in four weeks.

Russian doctor: In my country medicine is so advanced that we can take half
a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for
work in two weeks.

Texas doctor: You guys are way behind ; we recently took a man with no brain
out of Texas, put him in the White House for eight years, and now half the
country is looking for work.

Hide

Once an hunter was chasing an elephant, the elephant ran into a forest, on the way it met its Ant friend,
Ant : Hey, why are you running?
Elephant : Hunter is chasing me.
Ant (Generously) : You come and hide behind me.
Elephant : ??!

blood

An elephant was discharged from an hospital after an operation, on the way he met his friend Ant,
the ant said something to the elephant, on hearing that the elephant fainted, what was that? -
It said "I only gave blood for your operation".

motorbike

One fine morning, an ant goes off to the market on his new motorbike. On the way there, he meets an elephant who asks him for a ride to the market. The ant says, okay, hop on, and they're on their way to the market. A little while later, they come across another elephant who also wants a lift to the market. The ant says, okay, hop on, and they're again on their way to the market. Just before they reach the market, they crash into the truck. The paramedics arrive, and they see that the elephants are in a very bad condition, on the verge of death,.. but the ant has escaped with just a few minor injuries! Why is this so?


The ant was wearing a helmet (yeah, shoot me!).

basketball

The elephants of the jungle were playing basketball. There was one ant in the midst of all this. What was he doing?




she was the referee.

MERI TWACHA SEY MERI UMAR KA PATA HI NAHI CHALTA !

Ant : Haathi tumhari umar kitni hai?
Elephant: Paanch Saal !!!

Ant : Paanch Saal aur itnay bade !!!
Elephant: I AM A COMPLAN BOY .

Elephant: Cheetti tumhari umar kitni hai ?
Ant: Tees Saal.

Elephant: Tees Saal aur itni chhoti.





Ant: Haan ....
I AM A SANTOOR GIRL.... MERI TWACHA SEY MERI UMAR KA PATA HI NAHI CHALTA !

Killer English

Killer English

Class teacher once said :
"Pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!"
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
Once hindi teacher said...."i'm going out of the world to america.."
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
"..DON'T TRY TO TALK IN FRONT OF MY BACK.."
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
Dont..laugh at the back benches...otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down.....
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
It was very hot in the afternoon when the teacher entered.. She tried to switch the fan on, but there was some problem. and then she said
" why is fan not oning" (ing form of on)
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
Teacher in a furious mood...
write down ur name and father of ur name!!
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
"Shhh... quiet... the principal is revolving around college"
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
My manager started like this
"Hi, I am Madhu, Married with two kids"
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
"Will u hang that calender or else i'll HANG MYSELF"
************ ********* ********* ************ *
LIBRARIAN SCOLDE ," IF U WILL TALK AGAIN , I WILL KNEEL DOWN OUTSIDE"
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
Chemistry HOD comes and tells us...
"My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter"
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
Tomorrow call ur parents especially mother and father
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
"Why are you looking at the monkeys outside when i am in the class?!"
************ ********* ********* ********* ****
Lab assistant said this when my friend wrote wrong code..
"I understand. You understand. Computer how understand??
************ ********* ********* ********* *****
Seing the principal passing by, the teacher told the noisy class..
"Keep quiet, the principal has passed away"

जो जगलाच नाही, तो मेला कसा?

तो फार सज्जन माणूस होता.

त्याने कधी सुपारीच्या खांडाचेही व्यसन केले नाही.

त्याने आयुष्यात एकही खोटा शब्द उच्चारला नाही.

त्याने परस्त्रीकडे डोळा वर करून कधीही पाहिले नाही...

... तो मरण पावला,

तेव्हा इन्शुरन्स कंपनीने क्लेम नाकारला...

... ते म्हणाले, 'जो जगलाच नाही, तो मेला कसा?!!!'

व्यक्ती

नेहमीच्याच बारमध्ये नेहमीच्याच मेंबरांची सपत्नीक पाटीर् ऐन रंगात आली होती. रामरावांसकट सगळ्यांनी दोन दोन क्वार्टर रिचवल्या होत्या. अचानक रामराव चित्कारले, ''मित्रहो, आपल्यापैकी जे विवाहित असतील, त्यांना मी असं आवाहन करतो की त्यांनी उठावं आणि ज्या व्यक्तीमुळे त्यांच्या आयुष्याला अर्थ लाभला, ज्या व्यक्तीमुळे त्यांचं आयुष्य सुखाचं झालं,त्या व्यक्तीच्या शेजारी जाऊन उभं राहावं...''

क्षणार्धात रोज दारू र्सव्ह करणाऱ्या बगाराम वेटरशेजारी अशी काही झुंबड उडाली म्हणता!!!!

प्रश्न

आयुष्यात कधी ना कधी
आपण स्वत:ला
काही महत्त्वाचे प्रश्न
विचारलेच पाहिजेत...
आपण कोण आहोत?...
कोठून आलो आहोत?...
कोठे निघालो आहोत?...
आणि जेव्हा तिथे पोहोचू
तेव्हा
तिथले
बार उघडे असतील का?!!!

PEACE ON EARTH!

What do u call a woman in heaven?
An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven?
A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven?
PEACE ON EARTH!

walking in the highlands

While walking in the highlands Santa fell down a deep hole.
B: R u ok?
S: Yeah!
B: Did u break anything?
S: No, there's nothing down here

Best Friend

A Man 2 commit suicide,
When asked: Why are you crying?
Pathan said: My wife ran wid my Best Friend & i can"t live widout my friend.

Son: 'Mum, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.'

Mom: 'Well, you have done the right thing.'

Son: 'But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.'

problem

Wife: 'You always carry my photo in your wallet.. Why?'

Hubby: 'When there is a problem, no matter how great, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.'

Wife: 'You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?'

Hubby: 'Yes! I see your picture and ask myself what other problem can there be greater than this one?'

Marriage Humour

Wife: 'What are you doing?'

Husband: Nothing.

Wife: 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.'

Husband: 'I was looking for the expiry date.'

-------------------------------

Wife : 'Do you want dinner?'

Husband: 'Sure! What are my choices?'

Wife: 'Yes or no.'

Pu La Deshpande

Pu La Deshpande ekda T-shirt ghalun hindayla jatat. T-shit var tyanche nav thalak aksharaat lihile aste. "Pu La Deshpande". Tar T-shirt chya magchya bajula kay lihile asnar?
Pu Sh Deshpande. (pull/push)
------------------------------
Pu La Deshpande pohayla gele tar tyanna kay mhannar?
Swimming Pool (Pu L)

Gift

One man his MBBS & did his first operation.
Soon after finishing,the patient died.
He prayed: hey Bhagawan pehla gift swikar karo!

Musibat

SAWAAL: Patni maike jaakar pati ko roj phone kyun karti hai??
JAWAAB: Taki pati ko yaad rahein musibat tali nahi phir aane waali hai..

RAM ne dhanush toda to SITA aai
KRISHNA ne bansi bajai to RADHA aai
Aur Hamane citi bajai to wo apane Bap ko leke aai

Churail

Wife: Jab tum DESI pite ho mujhe PARO kehete ho, jab Whisky pite ho toh DARLING kehete ho. Aaj kya piya hai jo CHUDEL keh rahe ho. Husband: Aaj main hosh main hu.

Bhaiya

Ek ladka ladki dekhne gaya...

Both are in a room for 10 minutes to talk each other...

Ladki (Darte hue) : Bhaiya aap kitne bhai bahen hain?

Ladka : Abhi tak to 3 the..lekin ab 4 ho gaye.

kutta

“ Munnabhai: Ae circuit yeh kutte poonch kyun hilate hain?
Bole to Dog tail shaking WHY?

Circuit: Common sense hai bhai ab poonch kutte ko to nahi hila sakti hai na. ”

A: Doctor please help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
A: Phone per.

machar

lady drinking coke, machar falls in .
lady take it out ,
machar says ;maaaaaaaa
lady ask why u did u call me maaaaaaaaaaaa
machar says mien teri kook(COKE) se nikla hon maaaaaaaaaaaaa

jhoot

Two boys ko 3 live Bomb milte hai… Wo un bombs ko police ko dene Jate hai……..
(raste mein… )
First boy: agar koi bomb raste mehi phat jaye to???
Second boy: jhoot bol denge ke 2 hi mile the .

Churail

Aik aadmi jungle se guzar raha tha
A Churail stops him & says:
Hoo Hoo Haa Ha Ha, mai Churail hoon,
Aadmi:janta hoon, teri 1 behan mere ghar main hai.

phuljhariyan

Child: Mom is bar saray patakhay hum is shop say lain gay,
Mom: Beta yeh tu girls hostel hai,
Child: Papa tu kahtay hain k sari phuljhariyan yahin rahti hain.

Forest officer

Ek jungle mein chuhay se sab dartey the,
agar sher us k samnay aa jata to dar kar bhaag jaata,
haathi bhi kahin chup jata,
aas paas k log yeh dekh kar preshaan huay or kaha aakhir kia maajra hai,
pata chala chuha Forest officer tha

khilone

Boy: mom, aaj mera dost ghar AA raha hai....
ghar ke sab khilone chhupa de.
Mom: tera dost chor hai kya?
Boy: nahin, who apne khilone pahechan lega.

Ravan

Ravan had 20 eyes but he sighted only one woman!
You have only 2 eyes.......
But you sight every woman. Now tellme asali Ravan kaun?

boy- lagta hai hum dono ek sath nahi rah sakte
girl- kya mere papa se mile the
boy- nahi mai tumhari choti bhen se mila tha.

Beach

Father and Son were in conversation on the beach :
Son:Papa , Ise 'beach' kyo kaheete hai ?
Father: Tumhe nahe pata ?
Son: Nahe pata.
Father: Woh to Aasmaan aur Zameen ke beech mein hai esliye eesai beach kahete hai .

how to make babies

A second grader came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, guess what? We learned how to make babies today."

The mother, more than a little surprised, asked fearfully, "That's interesting. How do you make babies?"

"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."

Kirayedar

S:Yaar uth Bhukamp Aa Raha Hai,Saara Ghar Hil Raha Hai

B:

Soja-Soja Ghar Girega To Makaan Malik Ka

Hum Toh Kirayedar Hai

Science teacher: What is skeleton?

Pappu: Mmm.
Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it!

sleep

Principle to students: You people must sleep atleast 7 hours a day.
Students: Its impossile Sir!
College is only for 6 hours! [:)]

If You Have Talent

And

U Have Skill

And

U Want To Do Something For Others


Then

Don't Waste Ur Tym

Join ...



















Circus ..." ;->

saving trees

It takes 15 trees 2 produce d amt of paper that we use 2 write 1 exam.
Join us in promoting the noble cause of saving trees.
Say No Exams!

doctor

Agar doctor film bnate to title kya hota?

1-Kbhi khansi kbhi dama

2-Kaho na bukhar hai

3-TB no1

4-Kal patient ho na ho

5-Hum blood de chuke sanam

<('.')>
/"/
./"L


Sumtims my
MIND asks
Y I MISS U
Y I CARE 4U?
Y I REMEMBER U?
Y I SMS U SO MUCH?
Den my HEART answerd.
MENTAL patients need more care :p

Opposite

Wht is d Opposite of Jogeshwari?










Jogesh Dnt Wry!! :-)

Nw Tel,
Wht is d Opp. of Churchgate?


Eros Theater!!

macchar

Ek macchar ek takle ke sar par ja baitha...
Dusra macchar bola:- Waha kya ghar dunda hai..
Pehla macchar bola:- Ghar kaha re abi to sirf PLOT kharida hai...

RAVAN

One day RAVAN went to disco...
aur woh behosh ho gaya,
due to shock..!

why...??







bcoz the entry fee was Rs. 1500 per head. :-o

Thief with knife : Tera paisa nikal.!

Man :you know who I am?


I'm Finance Minister.


Thief:Acchha?To phir MERA paisa nikal.:-)

Pj of the week


Q :- How do you tell a rose to go to the moon?





A :- Gulab Jamoon

Bhikari Ne phone Kiya.

Hallo Taaj Hotel

Haa Ji

bhikhari -1 Pizza,1 Biryani

aur 1 RasMalai Bhej Do

Taj -Kiske Naam pe Bheju Sir

Bhikari - Allah Ke Naam Pe...!

एकदा गणिताचे शिक्षक वर्गात शिकवत असतात.

बंडू तु सांग "मी तुला १० गोळ्या दिल्या"
त्यातल्या ३ तू रोहिणीला दिल्यास ,
३ विजयाला दिल्यास अणि
४ स्मिताला दिल्यास तर
तुला काय मिळेल??

बंडू:- सर मला ३ मैत्रिणी मिळतील........
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सरकारी वकील आणि डिफेन्स चा वकील
फेरतपासणी करून करून कंटाळलेला सरकारी वकील आरोपीला म्हणाला : आता मी जे विचारीन त्याचं केवळ हो किंवा नाही, एवढच उत्तर दे.
खाल्ल्या मिठाला जागणारा बचाव पक्षाचा वकील: ऑब्जेक्षन माय लॉर्ड! सरकारी वकील माझ्या अशीलाला फसवू पाहत आहेत. काही प्रश्नांची उत्तरे केवळ हो किंवा नाही, अशी देता येत नाहीत.
सरकारी वकील: का नाही?
डिफेन्स चा वकील: असं असेल तर माझ्या २ प्रश्नांची उत्तरे द्या.
सरकारी वकील: विचारा.
डिफेन्स चा वकील: १) तुम्ही अजुनही तुमच्या बायकोचा मार खाता?
२) आजदेखील तुमच्या घरी तुम्हीच जेवण बनव

Children

You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

एकदा गणिताचे शिक्षक वर्गात शिकवत असतात.

बंडू तु सांग "मी तुला १० गोळ्या दिल्या"
त्यातल्या ३ तू रोहिणीला दिल्यास ,
३ विजयाला दिल्यास अणि
४ स्मिताला दिल्यास तर
तुला काय मिळेल??

बंडू:- सर मला ३ मैत्रिणी मिळतील........

Ek manus dudh pita pita marato.

Kase kay?

?

?



Karan mhais khali basate.

Funny Questions

• Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
• When you are not supposed to drive a car when you have been drinking, why do bars have a parking lot ?
• Why is a false eye made of glass?.....To look through....!!!???
• Why does an answering machine never gives an answer when I ask something ?
• Why do fortune-tellers first ask your name?
• What whish would stars make when they saw falling people.??

Ek Kutra rastyavar ulta zoplela asto, mhanje paay var karun

zoplela

asto.. Sagle lok tyaala yeta jata namaskar kartaat. Ka?



Dog cha ulta God ahe na

ek jant [germ] asato.. ani ek jantin[female germ] asate..

tya doghanche ekmekanvar khup prem asate.. gharun virodh

asalyamule

te palun jaun lagana karatat..

kalantarane jantin pregnant hote..

aapalya navaryala ti ladat yeun hi god batami sangate..

" aaho aikalat ka?? mazya potat janta zale.."

Bunty: Kya Tumhe SUNNY DEOL Ka No Pata Hai?

Vicky: Nahi Pata Q Kya Hua?

Banty: Bus Vo Ghar K Bhar Handpump Hai Use Ukhadna Hai....:)

1 Baniya Marte Waqt

Meri Bv Kahan Hy ?

Bv: Main Yahan Hoon

Baniya:Mere Bache Kahan Hyn ?

Bache: Papa, Hum Yahan Hyn !

Baniya: Ullo K Patho'n Dukaan Pe Kon Hai ??

बन्डु नापास होतो

बन्डु नापास होतो म्हणुन गुरुजी त्याच्या पालकान्ना बोलवितात.

गुरुजी : मी बन्डुला विचारले कि जर माझ्याजवळ ५ केळी आहेत आणि त्यातिल मी ३ केळी खाल्ली तर खाली किती केळी राहिली ? तर २ केळी राहिली हे साधे त्याला सान्गता आले नाही.
बन्डुची आई : काय मास्तर, २ केळासाठी पोराला नापास केलं व्हय. उद्या २ डझन केळी पाठवुन देते, करुन टाका पोराला पास.

Patient:MUJHE aisi medicine dijiye ke marne ke baad fir zinda ho jau
Doctor:Main kuch nahi kar sakta..
U plz contact EKTA KAPOOR !

Height of Laziness:
Thief1:Lets count the money we have looted today!

Thief2:I am so tired, We'll see it in the Newspaper tomorrow

Wife Lukz In The irror n Sayz To
Her Husband :
" I Luk HORRIBLE , FAT & UGLY ... "

Say Something Nice To Me
Sweetheart ... !!!

Husband : Your EYESIGHT Is Perfect .

Why Does A Sardar Clean The
Wall With A Ear Bud ????












Because He Knows That










" Deewaro'n K Bhi Kaan Hote Hyn ..." ;->

Once A Wood Cutter Went To A City



Suddenly All The Girls Started
Following Him

And

Became Crazy About Him




Guess Why ????














The AXE Effect ... ;-)

Women Live a Better , Longer & Peacful Life

Why ??

Very SImple ...

A Woman Doesn't Have a Wife !!!!!!

Ek Aadmi Ne Samosey Wale Se Kaha : O Bhai
Tumhare Samose Main Se Larki Ka Baal Nikla Hy !

Samosey Wala : Aby Tou Kia 5 Rs K Samosey Main
Puri Larki Nikle Gi ...

Beta : Papa Madam Ne Aaj Ek Sawal Poocha Jis
Ka Jawab Sirf Mere Pass Tha ... !

Papa : Mera Shona Puttar , Bta Ki Sawal Tha ???

Beta: Madam Ne Poocha Black Board K Pass Potty Kis Ne Ki Hy ...

ursday, June 19, 2008

वाघ आणि माणुस
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण वाघाचा उपवास असतो.....
=========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण वाघ टि व्हि मध्ये असतो...
=========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का??
विचार करा...
कारण वाघ पिन्जर्यात असतो....
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण वाघाला दातच नसतात.....
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण वाघाची मर्जी.......तुम्हाला काय करायचय???
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण वाघाला भुकच नसते....
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण वाघ अंधळा असतो...
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण वाघाचा मूडच नसतो...
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण वाघाने ब्रश केलेलं नसतं...
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण माणसाने अंघोळ केलेली नसते... अंगाला घाण वास येत असतो!
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण तो वाघ खेळण्यातला वाघ असतो!
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
अरे तो वाघ माणसाला खातो, ....मी खोटं बोलत होतो.
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...

कारण सामोरच्या मानासचे नाव वाघ आसते आनी वाघ वाघला खात नाहि.
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...

कारण वाघ लंगड़ा आसतो
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खातो का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण वाघला भूक लागलेली आसते
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण वाघ वेड् लागलेले आसते
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण वाघ चिंग आसतो.
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारन तो वाघीनी सोबत असतो...................................
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारन तो वाघ मोबाईलवर बोलत असतो................
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण श्रावाण चालू आसतो
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण वाघला मानासाची आलेरजी आसते
========================================

एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
आणखी विचार करा...
कारण वाघला शेवटची लोकल पकड़ायाची आसते
========================================
एकदा वाघ आणि माणुस समोरा समोर येतात पण वाघ माणसाला खात नाहि.. का????
विचार करा...
कारण वाघ डायटिंग करत असतो
========================================


जर तुम्ही शेवटा पर्यंत वचाला आसेल तर तुम्ही धन्य आहात

हे सर्व ज़ोक मज़े नहित ओरकूट वरुण घेताले आहेत
:)

Joke of the day

Here i am going to post joke :)


all the jokes taken from orkut